Joan Didion’s Diaries Reveal Her Motherhood Struggles—and, Maybe, the Hidden Danger in Her Family

Notes to John is a collection of descriptions of therapy sessions that Joan Didion wrote.

The notes were found in a folder discovered by her literary trustees in her office after her death.

They were donated to the Didion/Dunne archive at the New York Public Library .

Much of Notes to John will feel familiar to anyone who’s coped with a loved one cycling between recovery and relapses.

“My attempts to solve’ or manage Q's life were futile,” Didion admits, but relinquishing the fantasy of being able to fix life for her beloved child was easier said than done.

The exact nature of this “famous” incident isn’t clear, but it certainly does sound like Dunne was responsible for the scrambled eggs in Quintana ’s hair.

There is much talk of anxiety and depression in Notes to John , but anger gets mentioned less often, despite the barely perceptible but steady thrum of anger.