Care and Feeding is Slate’s parenting advice column. Here’s what you need to know

My sister-in-law is planning to throw a baby shower for me in a few months .

When I told her about it, she angrily told me that if I had any consideration for her feelings, I wouldn’t have one at all.

She hung up on me and it’s now been three weeks since I’ve heard from her.

I haven't seen my mom in over five years , but now that I'm pregnant, she's all about being “grandma” Jamilah: My mom married “ Brian’s Brian ” when I was 16 .

She thinks even the fact that his own kids don’t speak to him “isn” to him, she says, “It is my choice if I want to have a relationship with her and let her see the baby, and he’ll support me in however I want it.

She's watching her own child hurting, and she just wants to do whatever she can to stop it.